


Everyone Looks a Little Older After a Night of Singing the Doraemon Opening

by raftel



Category: Gintama
Genre: Dadtoki, Domestic, Gen, He's just a single dad who doesnt know how to deal with girl problems, Platonic Relationships
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-20
Updated: 2017-11-20
Packaged: 2018-08-09 04:08:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,063
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7786201
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/raftel/pseuds/raftel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kagura's first period scared Gintoki more than ghosts ever had.</p><p>20/11/2017: Revamped!</p>
            </blockquote>





	Everyone Looks a Little Older After a Night of Singing the Doraemon Opening

The years weren’t being easy on him. 

“Aren’t you too old to be barging into my room with nightmares?” Gintoki rolled on to his side, seeking comfort in the futon and willing Kagura to _go away_

“The one who comes with nightmares is you, Gin-chan,” she said, nothing unusual about her tone. “But no, there’s blood.”

“What is it? A nosebleed again?” There was no more going back to sleep, he thought.

“No, there’s blood out the other end.”

For a second, he stared, _Intently._ And then he remembered that Kagura was a girl and that this was inevitable, no matter how hard he hadn’t considered it.

“THE OTHER END? DON’T PANIC, KAGURA.” He was sure he stuttered far too many times for six words. 

What happened then? Fevers? He slammed his palm into her forehead. “Are you sick? Does anything hurt?” Gintoki asked, the tremble in his voice rightfully giving away the title of _The Man of the House_ to Sadaharu (or to Kagura, who managed to proclaim it on her own).

“I’m fine, and you’re the only one panicking,” she calmly said. “Don’t blame me if you wake Sadaharu up and he bites what’s left of your brains out, aru.”

“Anyway, for the time being,” he said in a shaky voice, “go get washed up, I’ll take care of your sheets.”

As she sleepily strolled away, he continued fretting in the living room. But he was an adult, wasn’t he? Hell, he thought. _How bad would it be?_

He wasn’t ready for it. Blood. Not much, but still.

Before he knew it, he was half-humming the Doraemon opening theme, the lyrics barely verbalized and the whole thing obscenely out of tune. Then, still singing, “Yes! I’m gonna ask for help from downstairs,” he said, trying to talk himself into thinking and acting rationally (or at all, really). But what good would an old man, a cat, and a robot maid do? Baaba must’ve forgotten what this is entirely. And do cats even get them? He didn’t want to deal with Catherine, he thought, unintentionally looking back at the number of old drunkards that spend the night complaining to the three of them. 

“Shinpachi!” Gintoki exclaimed like it was the most brilliant idea in the world, his voice still teetering between _about to lose it_ and _completely lost it already_. “Yes, Shinpachi would know a lot about this, housewives are always so dependable, yes.”

He picked the phone up and dialed the Shimuras’ number.

“Shimura residence,” said Shinpachi from the other end.

“Shi-Shi-Shinpachi-kun..don’t panic.”

Gin told him everything, and the surprise that had taken Shinpachi at first eased into a sigh of relief. “Is that it?” Shinpachi asked, easygoing enough for Gin to picture him smiling at the end of the line. “I thought it was something serious.”

And Gin’s desperate emphasis that it _was_ something serious was met with another soft laugh and the promise of salvation. “I’ll come by,” Shinpachi had said, and few worrisome minutes later, he finally arrived to be met by a hopeless groan from his employer. 

“Oh come on,” Shinpachi said rolling his eyes, minding Gin no more. And, “Kagura-chan,” he gently called towards the shower.

In the bunny-printed robe she got from Soyo, Kagura opened the door. Shinpachi shot Gintoki a look, _See? She’s fine. _He asked if she knew how to use the pads he brought along in a bag, and to that, she nodded.__

__“I would have brought Ane-ue, but she’s still at work,” Shinpachi said, settling down on the sofa. “Speaking of which, why were you asleep so early?”_ _

__“As expected, guys who grow up with sisters are different,” Gintoki retorted with hints of panic still in his voice. The true, unsaid, answer to Shinpachi’s question was 'I’m old and tired.'_ _

__Shinpachi sighed, and, “Stop worrying,” he said. “She knows about this, Ane-ue already gave her The Talk.”_ _

__“She knows?” Gintoki repeated, more relieved than he’d expected to be._ _

__“She _is_ a girl,” Shinpachi said, stating the obvious with no real condescension._ _

__Gin sighed and rubbed his hair, and with disappointments reminding him of more disappointments, the incomplete mission of cleaning up the sheets presented itself again._ _

__“The sheets are still stained,” he said at length._ _

__“What? Why didn't you wash them?”_ _

__“I got squeamish!”_ _

__“How the hell did you get squeamish? You fought wars!”_ _

__“Anyone would get squeamish if they saw their kid’s blood!”_ _

__“Gin-san,” Shinpachi said with a smile. “Did you just refer to Kagura-chan as your child?”_ _

__“I did not!” Gintoki replied, flustered and straining the final word._ _

__Shinpachi let out a gentle giggle then went to pick the sheets up._ _

__Not too long after, Kagura came into the living room in fresh pink pajamas. She spontaneously sat next to Gintoki like she always did after baths, making him dry her hair._ _

__She picked her nose while he ruffled the yellow towel and her hair underneath._ _

__“So you knew about all this huh?” Gintoki said, finally calming down._ _

__“Of course I did aru, Anego told me all about it,” Kagura bragged. “It means I am a lady now.” She wiped her finger on his clothes._ _

__“You’re still a snot-nosed kid,” he said, checking whether or not her hair was dry._ _

__“Staying with you for this long forced me to become an adult long ago. This household would fall apart without me, aru,” She said, following her statement with an uncovered yawn._ _

__“For a lady, you’re still pretty unsightly,” he said, patting his lap for her to lay her head. “Shinpachi still is preparing your futon.”_ _

__“Your screaming wore me out, I’m going to take a nap,” she said, words mixed with yawns. “If I wake up while you’re carrying me to my futon I’m going to bite you.”_ _

__“See? You still are a kid.”_ _

__“Old man,” she mumbled, falling asleep._ _

__Shinpachi came back a while later, after washing the sheets and putting them up to dry._ _

__“Are you feeling better now, Gin-san?”_ _

__Gintoki picked his nose with his index then rubbed it in her hair. “It’s only a matter of time until she brings in a boyfriend,” he said, too anxious to sound as matter-of-factly as he wanted to._ _

__“Stop worrying. I’m pretty sure he wouldn't be _that_ bad,” teased Shinpachi._ _

__Gintoki sighed, he was right. The only thing to worry about then was the task at hand._ _

**Author's Note:**

> Gin isn't even that old, but Dadtoki is something to run with.  
> 


End file.
